I will never forget the desire Gene had to attend a conference in California where Dallas Willard was the speaker. We discussed it but due to a lack of finances decided not to pursue it. Later that week, we received a donation from one of our faithful donors. The amount surprised us, because it was for the entire year, not their usual monthly gift. As we pondered this generous gift, we realized that it would cover the entire expense for the conference!
Could this be a provision from the Lord? We got excited but within the next breath decided it wouldn’t be wise to “spend” it all on the conference. After all, we would not be able to survive on a monthly basis for the remainder of that year, so we didn’t go. A missed opportunity because we were operating in the “SAFE ZONE”, not the “FAITH ZONE”.
The next week I was reading in Exodus about how the Lord provided manna for the children of Israel in the desert. He provided enough for each day, some however disobeyed and gathered more manna than they needed and saved it for the next day. BUT the next morning it was full of maggots and began to smell.
The Lord spoke to my heart and said: I provided the resources for you and Gene to attend the conference, but you chose to walk by sight, not by faith. You acted as though my resources were somehow limited and that I would not be able to provide for the remainder of the year. You were “saving” up what I had intended for you to “spend” on the conference. My heart was truly broken, and I wept knowing that I had sinned by not trusting in His gracious provision. I’m so grateful there is always forgiveness at the foot of the cross.
I spent that week in “regret mode”. God in His grace gave me a wonderful promise when I desperately needed it. Romans 15:13: May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. My life was not filled with joy and peace, but with regret and disappointment. By faith I asked Him to fill me with joy and peace. He was faithful to His promise, and I began to walk in victory!
FAITH = Fantastic Adventure In Trusting Him!